The Loudest Screams
by if.I.Should.Die
Summary: Rose is a 17 year old girl who does not speak. John is a 17 year old boy who never stops. Together they face dealing with the horrors of their pasts and the monsters that plague their minds. After struggling through very different and difficult pasts they both find their way to the Touchwood Institute for the Mentally Troubled. Hopefully this place will lead them to healing. AU
1. Chapter 1

Rose Tyler was pissed. She was waiting in the lobby of this fancy clinic waiting for her name to be called by the old receptionist. The room had beautiful abstract and landscape portraits on the walls and magazines artfully spread in front of vases of fake flowers on Cherry wood antique side tables bolted to the floor. Rose herself was fuming with her arms crossed tapping her foot impatiently on the carpeted floor and shifting silently on the plastic covered cushion of the chair. Everyone in a while the reception would start typing and pick up the phone to make an appointment for someone. The only noise to be heard besides the sporadic quiet chatting of the receptionist was the resonating ticking of the grandfather clock in the far corner nestled between two potted furns. About thirty minutes after Rose was dropped off by her mother, the door opened of the office down the hall and a girl left it, quietly shut the door and shuffled with her head down past Rose and down the hall back towards the dorms. The tapping of Roses foot was joined by her fingers as she knew it would be any moment now. So when the receptionist finally get a call on her intercom that requested the next patient Rose was up and marching towards the door before the receptionist even looked up to alert her. _Finally, God that took fucking forever_ Rose thought bitterly. She was pissed, she usually was, but it was provoked exponentially by the fact that not only was she forced her, she was made to _wait_ also. Rose just wanted to leave.

When she finally entered the office the first thing Rose did was observe and take note of everything in the office. It was tastefully decorated, matching furniture, paintings that accented the paint color and carpet. The bookshelves cover two of the walls were bursting with thick tomes about psychiatrist garble. The desk was crowed with random knick-knacks that seemed to be made by small children. Despite the crowding it was well organized and seemed functional. Finally Rose turned her gaze to the person sitting behind the desk on a long backed, black leather desk chair. The lady was clad in a dark blue pant suit and had her thick salt and pepper hair pulled back in a bun held in place by an ornate chopstick. She had minimal and natural makeup on and her mouth was curled in a gentle smile. Distrustfully Rose looked into the woman's eyes, surprised to see they were light and surrounded by wrinkles formed by years of smiles. Rose didn't think it was a real look, _maybe she had years of practice faking smiles to earn trust so that's why it looks believable._ The woman motioned for Rose to take one of the chairs in front of the desk and looked down to move some pages and write a few things down. Rose signed impatiently and the woman looked up at her immediately.

"Hello, you must be Rose, I am Dr. Elizabeth Bugged, the head psychologist and head of this institution. Right now I am going to give you a preliminary screening and after give you a tour of the campus and show you to your room. Sound good?" The woman looked at Rose kindly and waited for a reaction.

Rose stared at her for a momemt, her eyes communicating just how beligersnt she was feeling, before she gave a single curt nod. Dr. Nygard's smile broadened and she began to speak again.

"Wonderful! I see it says here from the application your parents filed that you have been mute since ten so I'll try to only ask yes or no questions. Would be willing to write if I need an explanation?" Rose gave a short shake of her head and her nostrils flared. "Okay, that's alright I'm sure we can work around it." Dr. Nygard gave another gentle smile and continued.

"So you were admitted here after being brought to the hospital for trying to overdose on sleeping medications. Would you like to talk about that now?" Another quick side-to-side shake. "Alright. At the hospital after being screened by a therapist and interviewing your parents and friends you were diagnosed with probable depression and bipolar disorder. Does that seem accurate to you?" Rose shrugged and the Doctor seemed to decide a new angle in the conversation. "Well I think I should inform you that your parents have enrolled you here with the urging of your Doctors for a twelve week stay that may be reinstated depending on your progress. You as of right now are a level red patient so you're staying in solitary dorms and have a strict scedual. There are privileges that you can earn as you progress. Eventually you'll be bumped to level yellow, then blue followed by green before we talk about you getting to leave. Sound okay?" _It's not likening have choice but, sure whatever you say boss I don't give a fuck._ Rose just nodded exasperatedly.

Doctor Nygard clapped her hands.

"Let's get this tour started then!"

...

 **A/N: I'm taking a new approach to the story. It will still have the same plot but I have new inspiration now. I hope y'all still will read.**


	2. Chapter 2

Dr. Nygard led Rose down the hall away from the waiting room and towards the recreational wing of the institution. They walked through a glass hall and Rose begrudgingly took in the beautiful gardens and lawns with a few patients spread out relaxing or playing outside. They came to a wide open room with ping pong tables and couches. Board games were stacked on shelves and a well stocked entertainment center was against a wall with chairs and couches facing it.

"This is the rec room. It is where all of the patients can come to socialize and have fun and mess around. As a red you'll be granted two hours in it. It's optional but we urge you to try it out." Dr. Nygard explained.

Rose nodded her head and shifted a strand of blonde hair back behind her ear. They continued through a pair of double doors which lead to a hall. Along the way Dr. Nygard pointed out the door to the outside. She informed Rose when she would be allowed to go into the main garden, and that she was only allowed out with a chaperone. Rose just grimaced and nodded. Not pleased with the notion of needing a babysitter. They walked further and into the large cafeteria. Dr. Nygard pointed to one end and said,

"The line for each meal will start over there, you move along and get your meal and at that station there you get your meds. Until you are level blue you have to take them standing there in front of an orderly to ensure you don't skip them." She had a sympathetic look on her face, as if she realized that such an act was embarrassing and to Rose, demeaning. They continued their tour and passed multiple closed doors, at each if them Dr. Nygard would explain what it was how it pertained to Rose. Finally they made it to the rooms. All the doors were closed and at the end of the hall they stopped at a room and entered. It was small, had a window and a desk and a small twin bed. The walls were white, matching the rest of the institute and sitting on the bed was Rose's small suitcase of belongings.

"This is your room until you make it to yellow and get a roommate. Since the day is almost over, you may stay here until dinner time and you meet your buddy." Her pager buzzed and after she looked at it Dr. Nygard became tense and anxious to leave. "I really must go, why don't you unpack your things and rest for a while. Somebody will notify you of dinner time if you chose to stay here." With that, Dr. Nygard shut the door and left Rose to process her new surroundings. She didn't like this idea of a "buddy" it seemed demeaning and childish. Rose felt she shouldn't require a stupid "buddy" like a six year old. _And besides,_ thought Rose, _if I was going to find a way to off myself in here, a fricken "buddy" isn't going to do shit to stop me._ Rose moved to start unpacking her suit case. It only served to frustrate her even more, because she was reminded that she could only wear sweat pants and t-shirts for now. _As if I was some fucking invalid. Ugh._ The clothes were put away quickly and soon she moved on to set up her bed with a comforter from home and her raggedy teddy bear. Rose placed her art supplies on the desk and organized the space as she preferred back home. Rose sighed and decided since she didn't have anything here she could use to help relieve her anger and she didn't feel like drawing, Rose lied down on the bed and tried to sleep. A task she accomplished shortly after lying down.

...

About three hours after Rose was left to her room, she woke up with a start. Silently she sat rolled over and sat up in the bed, startled awake by the knock on her door. Again her anger spiked, _who the Fuck wants to bother me now?_ Rose flattens the wrinkles from her shit and adjust her pants. She stomped her foot and huffed, annoyed when they knocked on the door again, _Fuck man just chill a damn second._ She marched over and opened the door to find a tall boy about her age leaning against the frame, when the door opened he fell into a little before catching himself and standing up again. The way he moved was very ungraceful, as if his joints were too loose, so his actions were flamboyant, yet precise. He spun around and ran a finger through his fly away hair that seemed to defy gravity, then put his hands in his pockets and looked down at Rose, with a smirk on his face and a glint in his eyes.

"Hallo there! You must be Rose Tyler!" the way he spoke amused Rose, as if every word filled his mouth, she liked how he said her name especially.

"It's time for dinner now, it being five o'clock and all. I'm supposed to show you the way!" his smile broadened and he stepped down the hall a little bit and motioned with his shoulder while his hand stayed in his pocket for her to follow him. Rose just glared at him, her golden brown eyes throwing daggers into him. The lanky boy seemed unaffected by this, though maybe confused as to why she didn't want to. _Fucking wanker acting like he's god's fucking gift to the world. I don't even know who the Fuck he is._ Suddenly the boy twisted to face her fully and brought his hands out of his pockets and rubbed them together, his shoulders dropped and he looked apologetic.

"Right sorry, I completely forgot to introduce myself, I'm James Smith, but every one here calls me the Doctor. It's very nice to meet you!" His stance went back to being confident and cheerful if not a little cocky and he held out his hand for Rose to shake. She just looked at it apathetically and, with her beligerance painted clearly on her face she looked him up and down, shrugged and walked past him toward the cafeteria.

 _I don't need someone to hold my hand through every step of my infernal stay here._ Rose's thoughts turned bitter again. Truthfully she didn't think James was a bad person, he might even be somebody interesting to hang around with albeit perhaps a little annoying. She knew though, it wouldn't end well if she tried to befriend him and it wouldn't be worth the hassle since she didn't plan on lasting long. As she was striding down the hall at a quick pace James quickly caught up to her, and once he did he matched her speed, and continued walking as if he was strolling through a sunny park, his hands tucked in his pockets and his shoulders relaxed back as if he was constantly leaning on something. Seemingly oblivious to Rose's blatant attitude he kept talking.

"Dr. N, or Denny as us residents call her, told me that you didn't speak. That's a shame because I am told that I seldom ever stop. I tend to just keep rambling on and on. I suppose it's caused me some trouble but it's helpful too, on more than one occasion it's saved my behind if I do say so myself. But back to you. I've got to show you the ropes of the dining hall, what food is good, who the nice staff is what lunch table is the most fun to sit at. Which of course is mine, you'll see why once I introduced you to my mates. I hope you'll join us, you seem lovely." they arrived at the mess hall and once inside Rose began to tune him out. _Definitely annoying._

They got into the line and Rose began tapping her foot again as she waited for the line to move up, once she noticed she was six people away from the start of the serving station she began tapping her foot. _God fucking damn it._ She had to begin counting. The line moved steadily and in five minutes she was holding a tray and the last serving what looked like very good pizza. _89, 90, 91_ the lady started to get impatient when Rose didn't instantly hand over the tray. _92, 93, 94,_ James nudged her, "give her your tray Rose," he prompted. Rose's anger spiked and she ignored him till she got to 99. She jerked her hands forward and the pizza was plopped onto her plate. Rose glared and flared her nostrils at James before turning on her heel and stomping forward getting more pissed off when she realized how much of a gap was created between her and the person ahead of her when she had to count. She grabbed a juice and a bag of chips from the counter and grimaced when she felt James had caught up with her again. The next step was having her meal checked over by the guy giving medicine. He nodded at her choices and passed her two small cups, one with a shot of water and the other with three pills. Rose glared at the man and knocked back both in rapid succession. And continued on sitting at an empty table hoping James wouldn't follow her. She angrily munch on her pizza trying to calm down, recognizing that she was getting way too emotional and on the verge of breaking down or something worse. _Come on you shit stick control yourself goddammit._ She inhaled seven seconds through her nose, held it eight, exhaled through her mouth for nine. It wasn't enough, she could feel it bubbling up inside her, hysteria and unrelenting anger. She started scratching her arm the food forgotten. Both hands moved up and down each arm, nails raking into the soft flesh, hoping the pain would sufficiently distract her. _Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck._ She was so lost in trying not to slip she didn't notice when a person sat down next to her.

"Hey, hey, look at me." James soft voice broke into her screaming thoughts and she whipped her head to look at him. Her eyes were wild and her hands were shaking, but her breathing had yet to become erratic. James raided his hand as if to touch her arm but she flinched so he changed course and moved it to the table and starts do tap his finger slowly _Tap...tap...tap...tap...tap...tap...tap...tap...tap._ "Focus on that Rose, breathe in on one tap and out on the next. I'll do it till you calm."

Rose did as he said. One part of her mind stayed focused on how she couldn't let this happen again, that having this stranger so in tune with what she was feeling was dangerous. But the larger part was just grateful for the help. For ten minutes she focused on the taps. Then when her head was under control she made brief eye contact with James and nodded her head twice, to signal that she was calm. He smiled broadly at her.

"See now, isn't that better? Right then. So do you like the pizza? I thinks it's splendid!" To say Rose was confused would be an understatement. She was baffled by how fast he just moved on, in any experience she had with somebody catching her about to have an episode they would stay stuck on


End file.
